eBook Listing For Genre "Humor"

Neville Lansdowne fell off the world.

Actually he did not so much fall off as let go. The world had been moving so quickly lately and Neville was finding it almost impossible to keep up.

Doodling is an engaging comic fantasy which relates the events that befall Neville after he finds himself abandoned by the world and adrift in the middle of an asteroid field. Douglas Adams meets Lewis Carroll (with just a touch of Gulliver’s Travels) as Neville wanders through his new home, meeting a variety of eccentric characters and experiencing some most unexpected adventures.

Intriguing stories revealed by cell phone yakkers and eavesdroppers across the globe. You will be charmed by touching romantic connections; lose yourself in wild lost-and-found escapades; cheer at poignant, lifesaving 911 calls—and then howl with laughter at pranksters’ antics, absurd customer service calls, and wacky insurance claims.

A few subjects covered in the book:
•LOL
•overheard
•love is in the air
•where ru?
•auto misdial
•saved by the cell
•ru tlkn 2 me?
•911
•lost & found
•jest kidding ;)
•does my insurance cover this?
•those #%@*! cell phones
•customer service

In a Cell Phone Minute roams from the strange to the interesting to the hilarious faster than you can say “Hello?” Go ahead…eavesdrop guiltlessly.

http://www.judyreiser.com

In Rantalicious: True Tirades from a Woman on the Edge, bestslling author and humorist Alisa Dana Steinberg delves into her off-the-wall life and mind to deliver these ultra-ranting and comedic tales that are signature Steinberg.

Explore Ambushed at work. Ambushed at Saks., Tales of Tirades, Discontinued Products and Sephora Lip Liner #133 , This Ranter's Guide to 1-2-3 Weight Loss, and much, much more in this funny and tantrum induced collection of real life stories.

Fearless Francis is a little boy living in Glasgow in the late 1950s. He lives in a fantasy world, playing in the tenement streets and backcourts, having all sorts of imaginary adventures…….but they are more like mishaps!

Children growing up in these old run-down Glasgow tenements did not know that the poor sanitary conditions and low pay endured by their parents contributed to ill health and low living standards.

A young healthy child like Francis only knew that fun could be had with his friends among the discarded furniture, abandoned cars, tin cans to use as footballs or climbing up small outhouses in the backcourts. Children did not need expensive toys to play with, just their imagination.

This introduction has 4 short stories:

The Martian Invasion Of Cubie Street

The Phantom Jobby Flinger

Gunfight On The Auchenshuggle Express

The Graveyard Game

This collection of light verse, written by Iowa native Beth LaBuff, will delight anyone who has lived on, visited, or even seen a picture of a farm. You'll laugh as you read about a corn crib that was repurposed by fowl society in "Barred Plymouth Rock Band," and learn what made a catfish sweat in "Catfish on a Hot Tin Roof." Perfect for family reading, each poem gives a nod to a Bible phrase or event.

A fun book. Approximately two dozen humorous lyrics and light verse, from one stanza to several pages. Appropriate for all ages.
The first of four volumes of the "If you like to laugh" series.

In an undisclosed location somewhere in China’s wall, a most peculiar baker labored dawn to post-nightfall. This surreptitious baker used fortune and good luck to craft world-famous dishes; his name was Peking Duck. So skilled in Asian cooking this waterfowl’d become— the multi-tasking Peking Duck could wok while chewing gum.

Come with me and explore my crazy brain, discovering my wild attempts at going back in time, cloning dinosaurs, starting private militaries, purchasing mountains, flying to Mars, making movies, selling videogames, and playing professional baseball. You'll laugh, you'll cry, but mostly you won't care about any of it. But read it anyway, because you'll hurt my feelings if you don't!

What could possibly be funny about a brain injury or breast cancer? You'll be surprised. These true-life stories show the lighter side of some not-so-funny challenges and demonstrate the upside to the uphill struggles with illness and injury and the downhill triumphs in overcoming them.

Annette Langer has created just the right "portable support group" a person needs to get through hard times with her easy-to-read, sometimes laugh-out-loud, book. Her stories relate many of her own personal challenges—from a brain injury suffered in a head-on automobile accident to breast cancer—as well as many of the scrapes and stumbles we all face. All the while, she stays upbeat and positive, guiding the reader to discover the inner strength to meet his or her own challenges in life.

Some of her chapters will tickle your funny bone while other parts of the book offer more serious, practical coping techniques. You're left with the realization that better times are possible despite the obstacles.

Here's a sampling of chapter titles to whet your appetite:

"My First Cruise...My First Gallbladder Attack"

"How to Bathe While Bandaged or in a Plaster Cast"

"Dr. 'Hottie': Everyone Deserves at Least One"

"My Positive Past (So Far)"

"How the Ducks and Others Helped Me Pass the Time"

"Losing Your Job, Not Your Life"

"Healing through Humor: Change Your Focus, Change Your Life!" is the perfect get-well gift for anyone struggling to overcome many of life's challenges or even as a reward for yourself when you too are facing less than sunny times. Come take the journey to self-empowerment and survival, even in the face of seemingly impossible circumstances, with a good laugh along the way.

Have you ever dreamed of winning lotto? Dreaming about all the things you will do with those amazing, wonderful millions.

Tahlia Cameron does. Every day! Poring over her gratitude folder full of the things she wants to buy, and do, and have. It possesses all of her waking thoughts. So does a certain suave TV actor.

Which TV star is she referring to? Michael Anthony! Star of the sexily suave TV naval drama she watches every week. Tahlia is convinced she will win lotto, and when she does, she will move to L.A. and marry him. Then the call comes. She's won lotto.

Moving to L.A. she sets up her business, goes after the man she loves, has run-ins with seriously bitchy celebs, one being the bitch (not the bane) of her existence, is stalked by a hot Italian stud from a hot TV crime drama, and saves a big wig TV network C.E.O., then his wife. And it all happens before she meets Michael!

But tragedy strikes at a huge network function, where she has to save Michael, and every actor, actress and C.E.O. from the network all while bleeding to death!!! And then open her company for business the following week!

Tahlia's life is now way too complicated as she battles her own anguished demons, life altering wounds and seriously depleted karma from the fallout. Everyone's calling her a hero. She sees herself as a killer. And the pain that follows is hell to deal with. But with the love of the man she finally snagged, she knows she can get through anything and gain her good karma back. Especially with Michael by her side. And then she receives a call. Another call. A call that's about to change her life. Again.

"Hello…Tahlia. This is Oprah Winfrey."

Recently divorced and out of work after 9/11, Ted Krever (no relation to the author)decides to go after a girl he was crazy about 25 years earlier-in Canada! And her sister! (not intentionally, I swear) And nearly destroys her business, putting Canadian men back in touch with their masculinity. This is a romance-with sex! And Viking ships! And storytellers roaming the Canadian woods, making stuff up!
WARNING: This is a silly book. You may giggle like a girl, even if you are one.

Gordon Kirkland brings his award-winning humor writing to the topic of the holiday season. He exposes the world to his feelings about everything from children's Christmas pageants, to artificial trees, and holiday lights.

Fans of Kirkland's other five collections of short humorous stories (three of which received the Stephen Leacock Award of Merit for Humour,) will enjoy more of his unique style focusing on the fun and foibles of daily life during the so-called joyous season.

In this collection, Kirkland stretches his muscles as a lyricist, writing new words for several old and familiar holiday songs.

For Better Or For Worse creator Lynn Johnston says, "I love to read his stuff, I just wouldn't want to be married to him." (It's a sentiment shared by a lot of women who sympathize with his long suffering wife, Diane.)

Fellow humor writer, Dave Barry says, "As a fellow class clown suffering from maturity impairment, I salute him."

See for yourself, Kirkland will have you ho-ho-hoing from start to finish!

Otto was having trouble relating to people, which is why the virtual world of Sword of Valour was so appealing. Here was a world where excitement replaced tedium, where you could kill annoying individuals, and where the level cap kept you from growing old. It seemed like virtual heaven. Sadly, it wasn't.

In Sword of Valour, you could be whoever you wanted to be. What was puzzling was that everyone seemed to be exactly the same as they were in the real world. The same hang ups, the same egos, the same bloody mindedness. The only real difference, as far as Otto could tell, was that if you killed someone, instead of rotting, they complained. It was enough to make you steal a fortune in virtual goods and sell them on the virtual black market for very real money.

A tale about who we think we are, who everybody else thinks we are, who we really are, and who we wish we were.

Kitty, are you wasting your nine lives by always napping on the same windowsill, chasing the dog around the kitchen table, sniffing catnip mousies on the couch? If so, you're in a rut. Roberta Beach Jacobson, former Cat Lady blogger at the Seattle Post-Intelligencer, encourages you to take charge, to strut your stuff, to be your own cat. She offers an inspirational exercise for every day of the month. Who doesn't desire to lead a flealess, fearless feline life?

Danny is one of life's armchair philosophers, and in a moment of complete absurdity asks himself if he has ever been in love. From that moment on he embarks on a quest to find out. Follow Danny as he searches for the 'Pink Blancmange', gets propositioned by a gay shop assistant, meets the 'mafia', discovers his mother's secret lover, and talks to a wall at a party. Life will never be the same!

Courier duty is not really one of spy extraordinaire Carrie Ragnarok's top ten assignments. Ferrying an object from point A to point B – that's stressful, but not very exciting. Not even if the object in question is Shape No. 8, a hideously ugly and extremely expensive sculpture by obscure Bulgarian artist Vassily Bagdanorowsky worth 2.8 millions dollars. But an unexpected mugging can spice up even the dullest courier job…

This is a short story of 3100 words.

From the author of "Text Me, A Tale of Love and Technology," "Notes from Ellen Wasserfeldman," and "Rantalicious: True Tirades from a Woman on the Edge" comes the bold and hysterical "Rantalicious: It's a Funky, Funky World" (Thrifty eBook Series)!

Author and humorist Alisa Steinberg continues her long line of off-beat, comedic vignettes with essays concerning what it is to be a Funky, De-funked or Smooth Light woman in this upside down world!

Find out where you are on the "Funkometer" in "Are You A)Funky B) De-funked or C)Smooth Light?" Discover where the Funky Girl came from in "A Woman's Evolution: Homo habilis ... Neanderthal ... Funky Gal". See why we're all connected in "Honey, De-funking is Fun or The Tragic Comedy that Unites Us". And get down to Flower Power and the Disco Ball with "The Sisterhood: Peace, Love and All that Crap".

Read "Rantalicious: It's a Funky, Funky World" and find out why Steinberg is considered the Ultimate Ranter.

The Wrinkly.
An early retirement in an idyllic community. Well, that was the plan...

Mike Lewis wants 'out'. Out of his meaningless career in broadcast sales, out of his shallow relationships with materialistic women, out of the youth-centric, big city rat race. Unfortunately he has no idea where 'in' is, until he discovers an idyllic retirement community in Florida that promises a peaceful, sunny life of golf and hobbies. On a whim he signs a contract for a house, and only afterwards does he read the small print: he has to be over 60 to join the enclave. Trouble is, he's 39.
Painted into a corner, he engages the help of a movie-makeup artist and a gerontologist and cons his way into the club. But, once inside, he finds that paradise also has its share of problems, as well as crime, cross-generational lust and an unforeseen identity crisis.

It has received positive reviews at various websites and ebook blogs.

Arlen J. Stevenson is a narcissist who uses his scant literary accomplishments to entice his online victims. Meeting and seducing vulnerable women is what drives this Alabama-born man. He flirts heavily with them via email or instant messages and often meets them in his lake house or at the woman's place.

These emails are presented in the raw to reveal how Arlen charms and lures these women. Being the owner of a vast MySpace site, he has access to thousands of victims. "I Want You: Seduction Emails from a Narcissist" is comprised of various emails that show Arlen's arc of seduction with 18 different women. You'll meet poetic Southern Pecan, desperate Betsy, flirty Debra, and new divorcee Ginger.

Arlen admits to that he's married so the gals appreciate his honesty. The love and long term relationships he proposes to the women lasts as long as it satisfies his ego and sexual cravings.

This is a unique volume as it can be read as either a sequel or a prequel to "Love Me, Need Me: A Narcissist's Tale."

Contains graphic language and sexual content.

This is based on a real-life young Russian woman who left her native country on a crusade to "teach the British people about our great Russian poet and playwright, Shekspeare." The idealistic girl quickly left Britain for America for some reason. She became the wonderful but comic voice of Russian language learning tapes.
This fun story is set in a bar for Russian expatriates. The other main character, an American, tries to impress the musically-voiced Russian girl with his knowledge of Russian. This is a fun story that will teach everyone a lot about the Russian language, if there actually is such a foreign tongue.

Is home more than ‘where the heart is’?

When Frank Turner informs his wife and teenage son they are emigrating from Liverpool to sunny South Africa, he is unprepared for their hostile response. His defiant son makes his own silent protest, and his wife’s assertion that “we never shoulda come” is parroted at every minor calamity.

The bewildered working-class scousers are thrust into an alien world of servants, strange African customs, unintelligible accents, and unexpected wild life (‘crocodiles’ on the wall).

Their uneasy interactions with Zulu servants, Afrikaner neighbours, and foreign officialdom exposes their naivety, but they each learn to cope in their own individual way; Mavis overcoming homesickness by hugging the knowledge that when Frank’s contract ends they can return home; Gerry’s sullen resentment giving way to love of the outdoor life, and Frank masking his own doubts with blustering optimism and bantering sarcasm.

Having overcome culture shock, the arrival of Mavis’s parents introduces a divided loyalty when Gert and Walter’s National Health glasses and ill-fitting dentures are seen through the eyes of the Turner’s new South African friends. And when Mavis’s sister ‘our Treesa’ and her opinionated husband Clive visit, Mavis surprises herself by hotly defending SA.

The turning point comes when the family return to Liverpool for a holiday. Gerry has outgrown his former feral friends, Mavis realises she is now an expat; a misfit in her former home, and Frank has fresh misgivings about their future.

If home means a sense of belonging –where do the Turners belong?

Set in 1988, BUT CAN YOU DRINK THE WATER? uses subtle observational humour, with an underlying pathos, to portray the upsets, hurt and changing family dynamics that emigration brings.
It will appeal to fans of Educating Rita and Shirley Valentine, and to expats, and potential expats worldwide.

In this loose parody of Dante’s Inferno, four Irish traditional musicians get lost in the backwoods of upstate New York the week before St. Patrick’s Day. On the journey, the band descends through nine hellish circles of American-style 3/17 revelry: Step-dancing princesses. Bobbing shamrock headbangers. Green beer bacchanals. Shillelagh-wavin’ geezers. O’Fun … not!
(WARNING: Abandon hope, all ye corned beef-allergic who enter here.)

At Last, a Coming—of—Age Novel That Captures The Essence of the Sixties...
David Justin is an Italian-Catholic, height-challenged youth, who is desperate to escape the bonds of sexual repression and adolescent innocence that hold him captive in the Age of Aquarius. Determined to cross that invisible line that separates childhood from manhood, David and his friends approach every encounter with a member of the opposite sex as a potential “first time.” Yet, they are always thwarted, due primarily to their own laudable sense of propriety. Their efforts are heroic yet laughable at the same time.
But, this is the “The Sixties,” the era of “sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll," and David will not be deterred—or will he? Find out what happens, as you follow his hilarious misadventures in Escaping Innocence (A Story Of Awakening) by Joe Perrone Jr. Available in regular and large print paperback and Kindle editions.

As Kriffle the Flidderbug investigates why his fellow 'bugs find it impossible to agree on the pressing issue of how many points there are on the leaves of the tree on which they live, he finds that the truth is more complicated, and ultimately more terrifying, than he ever could have imagined.

Flidderbugs is a political satire, a modern fable, or maybe just a funny little story about a bunch of insects with some very peculiar obsessions.

•Do you refuse to take the top newspaper on a stack (even if perfect)?
•Insist that the toilet paper hang "over"?
•Wait for the phone to ring at least twice before answering?
•Keep returning to the refrigerator hoping that something new to eat has materialized?

Outrageous, outlandish and downright ridiculous eccentricities exhibited (and confessed to) by otherwise normal people. From hilarious bathroom behavior, funny money routines, and unconventional clothing habits to eating and sleeping peculiarities, germ-a-phobia, and more. Everyone has at least one oddity in his or her daily way of life. Reiser documents the zany traits that make us who we are.

Just what extremes do people go to in their everyday activities?

•Flipping through a magazine at a newsstand then reaching for a fresh copy to buy because the one they were flipping through is no longer new.
•Enumerating (1, 2, 3...) while urinating and trying to end their peeing on an even number.
•Eating the most expensive part of a meal first, just in case they can’t finish everything.
•Ironing the newspaper before reading it to protect themselves against germs.
•Wearing T-shirts an equal number of times so none of them will get offended.

You will laugh while gaining insight into yourself and others!
People do the darndest things!
http://www.judyreiser.com